This morning I attended a concealed weapons permit class. It was held at a gun show, and the demographics of the other attendees...well, you can imagine. Although there were a supising number of young, attractive women (note to self: add that to the eHarmony profile that I don't have).
Tomorrow morning I have to go back for the shooting test. That was scheduled for today, but just before we drove to the shooting range, a police officer informed us that someone decided to pull a rent-a-suicide. That's where someone wants to kill themselves, but can't afford to buy a gun. They said it happens a lot. And if you think about it, that makes sense (no money...hard times...desperate...blah, blah).
Anyway, here are the top ten reasons why I am getting a concealed weapons permit:
1. Upon certification, I became an honorary republican, like Wendy.
2. Neither of my brothers wants to protect America from the terrorists like I do.
3. Unlike Erin, I don't hate the rights and freedoms afforded to American citizens.
4. This step was necessary to move from "semi-badass" to "full-blown badass".
5. Guns are loud and kick-ass. A concealed weapons permit just makes them super louder and kick-asser.
6. All the cool chicks dig guns and permits.
7. The permit gets me a two percent discount at WalMart, Denny's and the USPS (albeit in Texas, Alabama, Mississippi and Kentucky only).
8. Because Carsten, as a German citizen, can't.
9. It was a really tough course and I learned a lot about gun safety (see: LMAO).
10. Because Chris Obertin is a pussy and his wife would never let him get one.