Big news. The article below helped me "find God". This means a) the intarwebs cannot be deemed evil and b) I found God because someone else found God.
Unfortunately, this scenario doesn't work for lost car keys (and many other things...let your mind run with that one).
But the real problem is that when I found God, she told me the intarwebs were indeed evil. That creates quite a quandry and now I think I'm losing my faith.
Hopefully, this guy and his awesome hair-do can help.